see the throne

last night i was at my church's Good Friday service - a beautiful evening for an outdoor worship service celebrating a sacred death.
i was able to stand back and worship god in full view of the whole 3500 congregation....and as i was standing there and singing...or listening... i looked up and saw the throne of god.
this image happened right as we were singing JESUS PAID IT ALL.

picture it: a small, but postured woman, standing amongst 3500 people, just out from underneath an amphitheatre overhang...i am singing quietly, mainly listening and smiling. i open my eyes and look up to the sky and i see the amphitheatre in the shape of a throne.
and i hear this: i am complete. like the words of the song -

"JESUS PAID IT ALL"
... And when before the throne

I stand in Him complete

Jesus died my soul to save

my lips shall still repeat

Oh, praise the One who paid my debt

And raised this life up from the dead

before the throne. i stand complete. not expected to be what i am not. not expected to be anything who i am. not in need of change immediately. simply not without anything. i am complete. and delivered.
my prayers lately have been about release and surrender. release of the dross that has risen to the surface. surrender of the areas in which i struggle to trust without being compelled to fix. release of expectation. surrender of understanding.

once again, i am blessed to be walking in a phase with my heavenly father that moves me into refining, pruning, growing, and peeling back the layers of the onion. the swirling effect of this typhoon is getting heftier, but i do think it's also because the wounds/sins/awarenesses are rising to the surface.
we are complete - because god has attached his son to me. jesus is complete, because he is one part of the trinity. so if jesus and i are stuck like glue, then there is no way i can not be complete.

i am keeping the visual image of god's throne.
i am running to his arms and enjoying the journey of honesty and intimacy with my god.

Colossians 3:3 "for you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God."

Hosea 4:6 "my people are destroyed from a lack of knowledge."

2 Corinthians 3:16-18 "But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."